Emergency Meeting Minutes: 2009-05-10

Venue: The Usual Spot

Present: Agatha, 4th Dwarf, Conch Shell, Coyote, Woodsy
Guests: Shaggy Waiter

Regrets: Chair, Independent Observer

1. ESI Official Injury

By consensus, those present agree that the "Jones Fracture" shall be named as the official lower-limb injury of the Elgin Street Irregulars.

2. The Out-In Contest Winner

Aggie proposes that Bob be named the winner of her "Two things that are out that you wish were in" Contest.

4D: Why?

A: He hasn't won anything in any of our contests and his answers were delightful.

Woodsy: But hasn't anyone told Bob life isn't fair?

A stern look from Aggie suggests that she doesn't feel Bob needs to learn this lesson and ends further discussion on this line.

4D calls the question, Bob is unanimously chosen as the winner. As long as his choice passes the Ethics Committee, he may:

1. Post a favourite recipe on our blog;
2. Select a blog that we will metablog for a week; or
   
3. Select a blogging theme or issue for us for one week.

Congratulations, Bob!

3. Giving Grief

4D: What's next on the agenda?

Coyote: Giving grief to the Chair and Conch Shell?

CS: Umm...

A: No, the Chair's not here.

4. Planning for our 5th Anniversary

Coyote suggests that we cannot have a fifth anniversary because the ESIs do not have fifth things. A metaphysical and metaphorical discussion ensues on our relationship with fifths until CS points out that Coyote only just posted on fifths and he admits that he has been hoisted on his own petard.

A brief brainstorming ensues:

• A blog treasure hunt for fifth things
• There should be cake
• A party
• Fireworks
  
• A private party at the usual spot
• A vernissage of ESI art [possibly including art by our friends that we have blogged about, all our art at exhorbitant prices, no money to charity, not even split amongst ourselves

5. Wither the Blog

4D asks if "Wither the Blog" is on the agenda. "You weren't here last time," says Aggie. "We decided that's no longer on the agenda. It's irrelevant. "

"We're doing what we do best," says Woodsy. "Which is often nothing."

The meeting is adjourned.

Oops...we missed our 4-year Anniversary!

We've missed a lot of things lately. We ESIs get distracted easily. In case anyone is concerned about this, we haven't forgotten about the contest and will have an Emergency meeting VERY soon to determine the winner.
For those interested in looking back at our first post in celebration of our 4th Anniversary, here it is! The 5th year Anniversary will be huge. Just wait. We are already making preparations.

Your turn: Things that are OUT that I wish were IN...

Over at my blog, I've beaten the In and Out series like a dead horse. I thought I'd eke out just one more post, this time soliciting audience participation. I know XUP will be critical of the lameness of this. And, I know that Milan will question why we would wish things out to be in in the first place. I don't care. This is a contest, folks! Contestants are being asked to submit two things that are OUT that he/she wishes were IN. The winner will be chosen by an ESI sub-committee at a special Emergency Meeting. Hence, no ESI submissions will be considered. The criteria: originality, wit, charm.

The winner can choose one prize among the following items: 1) the winner can post a favourite recipe on our blog*;2) the winner can select a blog that he/she would like the ESI team to metablog for a week**; 3) the winner can select a blogging theme or issue for the ESIs for one week***.

*as long as it passes the ESI ethics committee
**as long as it passes the ESI ethics committee
***as long as it passes the ESI ethics committee

A Woody for You

Dear Zoom and GC,

The first one of you to contact me and offer me a bribe gets to know the secret location of this temporarily parked* Woody.

It's a Grand Slam just waiting to happen!

*It's for sale - only $4900

Meta-Meta Contest

Aggie and Woodsy have traded days for posting. The reason why we did the switch will be apparent later today, so stay tuned.

A few months before I was invited to join the ESI, a meta-contest was held on this blog. I entered the contest and won a prize. When my prize never materialized, I started whining annoyingly to Fourth Dwarf that I wanted my prize.

"Oh, don't you worry, my dear, you'll get your prize alright," he coughed out ominously.

I got my prize. It is hidden within this blog.

I would like to suggest a meta-meta-contest. Comment as to what it was that I wanted for my prize, then find the prize on this blog, and I will take you out for a coffee and a ginger cookie at Bridgehead - my treat!

Confession - Part II

iamaknitter,andiplantopostaboutknitting!

Phew, that feels better.

If this had been a contest, Zoom would have won!

Emergency Meeting Minutes: 2008-01-11 "The Megan Consultation"

Venue: The Usual Spot? Maybe. Maybe not.

Present: 4D, CS, Agatha, Coyote
Guests: Pandora, Woodsy
Featured Guest: Megan
Absent with lame-O excuse: I-O
Late: Chair

4D distributes vitamin D to all but Woodsy.
4D offers to take minutes so that they will be done right.

Pandora suggests that 4D also draw pictures of those present like court reporters do.

Our Consultant, Megan, arrives. Conch Shell is introduced and gets up to go.
"Any word on posting?" she is asked.

"Very, very soon. Like this weekend." And she leaves.

Megan settles in. 4D checks to see she is wearing the top that makes her breasts look shockingly large, but he cannot tell. And surprisingly, manages to refrain from public comment on the topic until typing these minutes.

We ask: Do you need a flip chart stand? 'No.' Laser pointers? 'No.'

Megan: You've fixed all your blogging problems.

Agatha: Oh, should we talk about the Bank Street people then?

Megan: The Bank Street Blog? ...Irony without earnestness.

Megan and the ESIs share thoughts on the Bank Street Blog. 4D announces that he will prepare a posting welcoming them to the blogosphere after he does the minutes.

Coyote: Or after Conch Shell posts. [to general laughter]

Megan: Maybe before...

What to do about Conch Shell?

Megan: Is there something she could do that doesn't involve posting?

Coyote: There's the tagline under the ESI title banner.

Agatha: But she wouldn't do that. We could post for her...

Megan: Or you could trick her. Email her a question?

Coyote: Does Conch Shell answer email?

4D: It's rare.

Agatha: Or a phone call.

Megan: And I guess it would only work once.

Pandora: Maybe it could be Conch Shell's job to never ever post.

Consensus: This would be workable and the worst that could happen is that the Oppositional Defiance Disorder prevalent among the ESIs would result in her actually posting.

Back to the ESIs
4D: Agatha, you were the one who first suggested we engage Megan as a consultant. What did you think she could bring to us?

Agatha: I've been feeling our group is too insular, it would be good to bring in people from outside. I would ask: What should we do more? What should we do less?

Megan: Just more of what you're already doing. One theme I've liked is the searching for a new muse. It's entertaining. Does it have to be only Ottawa?

[The Chair arrives. 4D asks if we should have any concerns about the in-a-delicate-condition T and her husband. "The one who pissed his pants?" asks the Chair. This brings up the issue of us creeping bloggers out. 4D shares a story of a blogger - a young woman who doesn't blog so much any more - who, at the coffee shop she always blogged about, had a fan appear and sit down with her. It creeped her out. "It wasn't me," 4D clarifies.]

Guest Bloggers
Megan agrees that the Andrew ZRX posting was a tremendous success. Pandora suggests that we could auction off the chance to post on our blog. The Andrew ZRX story is patiently explained to Pandora and no one says anything like "Where the hell have you been?" Perhaps because our guest consultant had everyone in such a lovely mood from her compliments and she is an ettiquettist after all.

Megan suggests we could have a contest with a skill-testing question to award the opportunity to be a guest blogger and the skill testing question could be the sort that makes them prove their worthiness for a guest posting.

Chair: Maybe we should turn into a Cat Blog.

Agatha: I love Duncan.

Megan: I would read anything Zoom wrote.

Consensus: Zoom has the best blog in Ottawa and we should do something to recognize that.

Chair: Or we could bring in Cousin Oliver [and then explains that Cousin Oliver was the kid brought in to revive ratings on the Brady Bunch, generally held to be that show's Shark Jump.]

4D: Maybe you could take on Cousin Oliver as a new persona. It might revive your interest in blogging.

Megan asks the Chair why he hasn't been blogging.

Chair: The City is getting boring.

Megan: The Mayor just got arrested!

4D: You have to understand, the Chair has been jaded for about 20 years.

Coyote: And before that he was just apathetic.

4D announces that he is ready to stop taking minutes.

Agatha: I'm just overwhelmed that Megan is here with us.

Chair and Coyote: We are not worthy! ... We are not worthy! [with the bowing and hand gestures]

Megan: Just do more of what you're already doing.

Official portion of meeting is adjourned. General conversation takes place in which further compliments are exchanged. The ESIs also interact with other patrons of the establishment, one of whom introduces himself as a reader. 4D's does a brilliant thespian portrayal of a person who is ignorant of the Elgin Street Irregulars, but the fellow persists, points out that we're sitting with AsteroideaPress and tells the 4th Dwarf that he is the 4th Dwarf.

And who are you? Asks the Dwarf, wondering why he is the only one who ever gets outed.

davewoods.ca says the young man. Who then insists he is not part of any group blog. Even though 4D narrows his eyes the second time he asks.

"Perhaps we should stop addressing each other by our aliases when we're in public," says the Dwarf after the young man rejoins his dining companion.

Avatar Battles: What I'm talking about

Best quote: "We need a dwarf!"

Presenting..... Tiana's Prize

Tiana's prize is ready. Remember that confusing metacontest when contest participants could win the prize he or she requested? Tiana requested a handmade ornament, and she won!
This ornament is a miniature log-cabin quilt square. I thought this seemed appropriate for Tiana right now as she settles into the holidays. I like the symbolism of the log-cabin motif. The red in the centre symbolizes hearth and home. I used red and green because of the Christmas thing, but I like the tropical feel of this piece. The lighter colours represent the lighter things of life (the sunny side of the cabin!) The darker colours represent the darker and deeper sides of life. I hope you like it, Tiana. It is ready for delivery!

AndrewZRX: Motorcycles, Birth Classes and Roundabouts

This is a guest posting from AndrewZRX:

I recently blew up my motorcycle. I wouldn’t do this every day, but I’d highly recommend you try it at least once.

Wait - how does pre-natal classes at 7:30 am on a fucking Saturday morning sound? With my tongue still pickled, too, from the scotch the night before. Soften that cervix, baby.

No, the motorcycle sounds better. Or it did, anyways, before it blew up. Have you ever seen piston rods blasting out the front-end of a high-revving four-cylinder 1100cc motorcycle engine?

The midwife droned on for three full hours, using stained, filthy props and plastic posters of a graphical nature. The most interesting bit was the bit about the placenta -- or, more precisely, what people do with it afterwards. Some bury it in the garden during the full moon. Incantations are involved. Some people take them home and eat them. Apparently they’re quite tasty with garlic.

Actually, neither have I. (Seen the piston rods etc.). But as it was happening I was worried about grievous bodily harm, if you follow. Luckily all is well. So says my wife at least.

Do Canadians eat their babies’ placentas? I don’t know. But I sure miss Canada. I have a soft spot for those Canadian government screw-ups. Scandals in Canada rarely involve 25 million lost records, or illegal wars, or the shooting of innocents in the back. Canadian screw-ups are generally benign, and I miss them.

I miss the seasons, too, but at least over here I can ride my bike year round. It gets slippy in the roundabouts sometimes, but you can still do it. Roundabouts are a good thing. We should have them in Canada.

Here a few things you should know about roundabouts:

• If you like, you can go round and round. Just keep going. Beware of dizziness.

• There can be several lanes in a roundabout. Incorrect use of roundabout lanes can result in permanent disfigurement and embarrassment. Utilize with caution.

• It’s usually best to figure out where you’re going before you enter the roundabout. Otherwise you may get herded and end up in East Kilbride.

• Roundabouts can creep on a man. You can prepare yourself for this irritating tendency by driving faster than everyone else. When the roundabout materializes out of the Scottish mist, just claim it as your own.

• Roundabouts are not the place to be gentle and kind. Be assertive. Exercise your roundabout rights.

• When you start seeing signs for East Kilbride, you are lost. Do not head for East Kilbride. Circle back and try again.

• Drive on the left. This can take some time to master. But it’s fairly important. Watch for roundabout combatants coming from the right.

• Roundabouts are a serious business. Remember this and you’ll do fine.

It seems there are a few things you should know about labour as well. But I can’t seem to remember. She kept heading off on these strange tangents, telling fragmented stories. My mind wandered. Once in awhile my ears would perk up, expecting to finally hear something useful. But then she’d backtrack again, and I’d drone out. I was thinking about a bass riff in a John Scofield song called Over Big Top. The bass gets right in there and opens up doors.

We’re due at the end of January, so I just bought a new motorcycle. It’s black and shiny and pulls wheelies without much effort. Maybe I’ll get a sidecar for the wean. Hopefully I won’t blow this one up too.

AndrewZRX lives in Scotland and bought the opportunity to post here from Zoom in an auction on eBay. If you are wondering what placenta looks like, he offers this link.

Encouraging AndrewZRX

There were 25 responses and the poll is over so I have sent the following message to our friend AndrewZRX:

Andrew,

Hello from me and your friends at the Elgin Street Irregulars Blog.

How are you? I trust you are well and that the reason we haven't heard from you is that your life is full of fun and excitement. If you are under the weather, I hope you are taking your vitamin D to compensate for the lack of sunshine in your day.

I realized we haven't given you much assistance with your blog posting prize so I ran a poll to see what our readers would be most interested in.

You can see the results at this link.

The bottom line: Somebody out there would like to read just about anything you write unless it's about politics.

You'll notice that 10 people would like you to divulge "an embarassing sexual incident" from your recent past, but I would take this with a grain of salt. I know some of those people and there are plenty of sexual incidents they have no desire to hear about.

So far, four people, one of whom would have to be your friend Zoom, say they would like you to write a posting that concisely touches on all the topics in the poll. I say that these people are demanding and greedy and should not be pandered to. Essentially they are asking you, a complete novice, to write the ultimate (or Platonic ideal) blog posting.

Instead, why not tell us about your pet?

Your friend,
Fourth

p.s. I'll be posting this on the blog and suggesting that readers use the comments to the posting to encourage you, ask questions, or make suggestions.

Let's give AndrewZRX more help

We haven't heard from AndrewZRX for a while. I suspect he has blogger's block. I also suspect that, with the wide range of things he could write about in his one posting on our blog, he doesn't know what he should go with.

That is why I have placed a poll in the side bar. Please take a moment to read the list and vote for your choices.

I believe I can add items to the list until the poll closes, so feel free to suggest additions in the comments to this posting.

Emergency Meeting Minutes: 2007-11-09 Part 1 - Meta Contest Winner!

Venue: The Usual Spot
On Time: Fourth Dwarf, Coyote, Agatha
Late: Conch Shell, the Chair
Absent with notice: Independent Observer
Emergency: Meta-Contest and Terms of Reference for Consultancy
Called by: Agatha
Minutes by: 4D

5:19pm: Coyote suggests that we have quorum and can begin the meeting. 4D insists we wait until 5:30, the time that Aggie chose to begin.

5:30pm: Aggie calls the meeting to order. Coyote unwraps Woodsy's bribe. Aggie asks how we should divide it. 4D suggests each present takes one of the 3 Lindts, one of the 3 Ferrero-Rochers, and we divide the Toblerone between us. Aggie asks if perhaps we might have preferences, so that each of us could take a different brand. 4D shrugs. "Okay. I want this one," he says, reaching for the Lindt. "Me too," says Coyote, placing his own paw firmly on the Lindt so that 4D cannot take it. "Okay. We'll divide it," says Aggie.

4D begins reviewing contest entries; restarts when Conch Shell arrives; then restarts all over again when the Chair arrives. All present reflect carefully on each entry.

Urban Pedestrian: one of Aggie's home-made muumuus

4D notes that UP, with four entries, should be recognized for her frequent participation in our blog comments. But for this prize, all look to Aggie.

"Too much work," she says.

Woodsy: the t-shirt with "Rock on" and "Anyhoo" (very tight slinky number (size petite), not one of those baggy, oversize thingies that Dwarfie wears.)

4D is feeling kindly disposed to Woodsy because the Lindt white chocolate ball he consumed tasted great. Aggie is similarly kindly disposed.
Coyote notes that he has ethical issues to raise regarding the bribe: "In future, I'd like to see a lot more chocolate - and of higher quality."
4D notes a problem with Woodsy's prize suggestion. She wants the t-shirt with "Rock on" and "Anyhoo", yet she wants it to be a tight slinky (size petite) number. The fact is that the t-shirt is size XXX-large. It is tight (and slinky) on 4D, but would need staples or binder clips to be slinky on Woodsy.

Urban Pedestrian: a new pair of pink go-go boots, size 7 1/2.

UP's second entry is recognized to be 'not bad', but as our shopping professionals had not spotted any pink go-go boots at Value Village, St. Vincents or the Sally Ann, UP will have to hope for one of her other entries.

Harmony: world peace - "An inner disarmament of the human soul that replaces jealousy and hatred with compassion and a holistic world view …."

Aggie and Conch Shell indicate they would be prepared to work on inner disarmament. Coyote suggests this is all too complex. 4D and the Chair are completely opposed. Things get ugly. Expletives are uttered. Cutlery is waved in threatening fashion. Bar staff intervenes and restores order.
Harmony will have to stick with her Lama friend for this one.

Apostrophe: a kick in the ass

No one is prepared to declare Apostrophe the winner, but we'd be happy to arrange a kick in the ass for him.

zoom: a mojo kit, with little treasures contributed by each of the ESIs.

Still affected by the fight over inner harmony and the the Kick in the Ass suggestion, the ESIs aren't feeling the Mojo.

Audrey: a Google poem written by the ESIs. ... mention my name ... dedicated to me

"We don't write Google poems," says 4D, "we find them."

Tiana: I would like to win a poutine made with crisp potato fries, squeaky cheese curds and a thick vegetarian gravy that hopefully doesn't taste mushroomy.

"Who wouldn't want this?" asks 4D. "If we knew where to get this we would have a new usual spot."
"Besides," says Coyote, "vegetarian gravy is an OXOmoron."

[4D notes that all of the following entries did not follow the contest rules because they were not posted in the comments attached to the original Meta Blog posting, but to update postings, or in one case to another blog entirely. "Fantastic," says the Chair, "eliminate them on a technicality. Very Ottawa!" Aggie and Coyote insist that we give these entries an equal chance.]

Urban Pedestrian: An opportunity to find us another muse to metablog.

"Perfect" says Aggie. Everyone nods in agreement. The quest for a new muse has become a frustrating crusade for the ESIs. "But what does Urban Pedestrian have in mind?" asks 4D. "Is she thinking of being our new muse and having us metablog her? Or is she going to help us find someone else?"
"Does it matter?" asks Aggie.
"Her blog doesn't have enough personal revelation and dysfunction," notes Coyote.
"And she doesn't really know what she'd be asking for," says 4D, "it's a real be careful what you wish for situation..."
"We should direct her to some of the postings after the unveiling," says the Chair. [example]
"I miss the Fifth Muse" says Aggie. The ESIs spend a few minutes reminiscing about highlights of the time they spent following 5M's adventures.

Urban Pedestrian: 2 million dollars

The ESIs are ready to move on with no consideration of this prize until 4D notes that UP did not specify which "dollar" she wanted and at current rates, $2 M Zimbabwe would come to about $64 Canadian. "Still too much, but with Zimbabwe's hyper-inflation, we should keep an eye on it."

Asteroidea Press: I think that the prize should be a light bulb sculpture.

4D announces that he has investigated this possibility with the lightbulb sculptor. "He says that he's already sorry he invited us to his last couple of parties, he's still cleaning up from Halloween, he really doesn't want any further association with us and we couldn't afford his price for a light bulb sculpture anyway.
"So if she wants a light bulb sculpture, she'll have to go to him," says Aggie. All agree.

bob: "a really good idea" of what to get my cats for their first birthday... ideas of other genres too.

"I think he's already got this," says Aggie.

Eternal_Hermit: Since I'm in no need of material things at the moment, I'll win by default, wishing someone else wins

Aggie is irritated. "I do not want him to win."
"He can't," says 4D. "If he wins, he loses, if someone else wins, he wins, therefore he loses."
Coyote asks, "Can we give him Apostrophe's kick in the ass?"

Tiana: a hand-made Christmas tree ornament.

4D notes that Tiana is a total hottie. "Seems obvious who should get the prize," says another ESI. "Should that matter?" asks Conch Shell. 4D notes that anything that helps us reach consensus is a good thing.
Aggie indicates that she would be extremely happy to craft a Christmas tree ornament for Tiana.

bob: Aggie's cat pillow ...

Again, we all look to Aggie: "I'm out of fish fabric. But I would do anything for Bob." All agree that it would be best for Bob if we kept his involvement with Aggie at a minimum.
Coyote notes that Bob should consider the pillow to be a great idea for a present for his cat.

The Winner:

Although the discussion of each winner has taken a long time, the ESIs quickly decide that the Winner of the Contest shall be:

Tiana, who shall receive a hand-made Christmas tree ornament.

And in a feeling of magnanimity, they announce a First-Runner-Up:

The Urban Pedestrian, who will be invited to help us find a new muse.

Thanks to all for entering!

[Minutes for remainder of meeting to follow...]

Hype

The Meta-Contest deadline is rapidly approaching (Nov. 8th - 7 p.m.) Although there have been a couple of solid entries, I am not feeling quite enough HYPE about this contest. Or, perhaps it is one of those contests that is just too good to be true. The Prize is THE PRIZE YOU SUGGEST, folks. How good is that? Don't deny yourself a good prize. Think about what you want, what you really want -- and ask for it!!! You have about a 1 in 10 chance of winning. And, you can submit multiple entries. No strings attached. What do you have to lose?

Meta Contest Update

So far we have 5 entries in the new Meta Contest:

1. Urban Pedestrian: one of Aggie's home-made muumuus;
2. Woodsy: the t-shirt with "Rock on" spelled out on the front and "Anyhoo" on the back specifically, one of those very tight slinky numbers (size petite);
3. Urban Pedestrian: a new pair of pink go-go boots, size 7 1/2;
4. Harmony: World Peace; specifically first inner disarmament, then outer disarmament; and
5. Apostrophe: a kick in the ass.

One of the contestants has decided to call on various world leaders to influence our decision-making. Perhaps this will sway other contest judges, but not me.

You still have time to enter, and the earlier you enter, the more time you have for your lobbying efforts.

Return of the Meta Contest

The time has come to launch the second part of the meta contest.

How to Win:

• Before 7pm, Thursday, 8 November 2007, write a comment on this post suggesting a prize.

The Winner Will Receive:

• The very prize that they suggested.

The Winner will be determined by consensus of the Elgin Street Irregulars. No consensus = No winner.

Questions from Our Guest Blogger AndrewZRX

The winner of Zoom's auction, AndrewZRX, wrote me several days ago:

Greetings Mr. Dwarf,
It seems I have foolishly won an eBay auction for an ESI guest blog. I am new to the ESI experience and therefore require some guidance. What have I actually won? (Do I even want to know?)

Just to fill you in on some boring details about me:
[personal details about Andrew redacted in case he doesn't want to share them with all of you] I myself don't have a blog though I do write some.

Can you give me an idea of the kinds of readers who frequent the ESI blog, and what, if anything, I should be doing regarding this most unfortunate turn of events.

Thanks
Andrew

Yesterday, I replied:

Hello Andrew,

Please, my father is Mr. Dwarf, call me Fourth.

Sorry about the delay in replying. I often forget to check my email.

You've won the opportunity to do a posting on our blog. http://elginstreet.blogspot.com/

We consider ourselves to be a metablog - a blog about blogs, but we also have postings on anything that tickles our fancy.

I'm not sure about what kind of readers we have. Perhaps I can give you a better answer tomorrow.

- 4D

If any of you have thoughts on what I might tell young Andrew, please leave a comment to this posting. The matter was also discussed at an Emergency Meeting largely held to address this topic and I believe Aggie will be posting the minutes any moment now. [After the beating I took for answering the meme all by myself, I don't dare answer Andrew's question on my own initiative.]

Zoom's Auction Status

Some ESIs think that Zoom is brilliant for auctioning part of her prize for winning the first Meta Contest. Others think she is stretching the spirit of the rules and wimping out. While we debate this, you, the innocent readers of the metablog, suffer. Why? Because today would have been the start date of the second Meta Contest, but we don't want it to be competing with the Auction.

Guest Posting from Zoom

After some angst and developing stress symptoms, Our first Meta Contest Winner Zoom writes:

Dear ESIs,

I am pleased to submit my guest post to you, and I thank you for your patience. It helped that Aggie pointed out it could be short.

My post consists of a single link: Click here

I trust this satisfies my contractual obligations to the ESIs.

I wish you all the best with your future contests, which I will watch from a safe distance.

Sincerely,

Zoom

The Meta Contest Winner

As was mentioned in the minutes of our last Emergency Meeting, the Elgin Street Irregulars met last week and selected a winner from among the entries to the Meta Contest.

We made a list and checked it twice with thorough discussion of the merits of each entry.

Tiana: choose a location in the city and people need to determine that place via your excruciatingly obscure clues and photos.

Lovely idea for a contest, we're good at excruciatingly obscure, but...

• maybe not so good at clues and photos.
  

A. & J.: Show off hidden gems of Ottawa. Nothing touristy, easily visible and it has to be in the downtown core. Something that only the locals would know about. A real hidden gem.

Lovely idea for a contest, but...

• It would be a fair amount of work; and
  
• We want to keep our gems hidden; look at how the Usual Spot has been wrecked by popularity.
  

Ted: I think you need to recruit a new regular to save your blog.

A new recruit might indeed save our blog. It could be like Rock Star: Supernova or the Search for the Next [Pussycat] Doll and the contestants could be given tasks that would generate blog postings for weeks and weeks (example: This week we want a photo-shopped image including elements from a 60s TV show and Stéphane Dion's shadow cabinet), but...

• We're probably not ready for a new member[*]; and
  
• We don't really want to be like Rock Star: Supernova; we'd rather be like the Ed Sullivan Show.
  

Harmony: I was thinking of hidden gems too. But I know a couple that aren't exactly in the core (though not outside the green belt either!). Could we expand it to include a larger area?

Sorry. We're the Elgin Street Irregulars. We are not suburban people.

zoom: [Entry #1] ... how about a treasure hunt? You hide something wonderful somewhere in the city and offer a series of daily clues (photographic and/or textual) to its whereabouts. The Citizen did this decades ago - they hid a gold bar...

A lovely idea for a contest, but...

• We haven't got a gold bar to give away; and
  
• It's been done.
  

zoom: [Entry #2] You could even have a pre-contest contest in which people could enter their suggestions for prizes.

Congratulations Zoom! This is the perfect suggestion for our next contest because it:

• Is easy;
• Lets us stall a while longer before coming up with a real contest; and
• Perfectly captures the self-referential nature of this blog.
  

A big thank you to all entrants. We regret that there could only be one winner. None of you are losers. (Except in the sense that you did not win, and therefore technically, you lost.)

Details on the Meta-Prize Contest will be posted on the weekend.