Metabloggers Missing in Wake of Rita

MIAMI (Reuters) – Noted Ottawa metabloggers, the Elgin Street Irregulars, were reported missing after the vessel they had chartered failed to return to port this morning. The Vendetta set sail for the high seas late yesterday afternoon as the group celebrated International Talk Like a Pirate Day. Listed among the missing are: Coyote, 6th Apostle, 4th Dwarf, Agatha, Conch Shell, and the Independent Observer.

The vessel was last reported about 250 km south of Grand Bahama Island. Tropical Storm Rita has battered the region with maximum sustained winds of over 100 kph. Sources with the U.S. Coast Guard have stated that some debris was retrieved from the area but that it is too soon to determine whether it can be linked to the missing ship. A Coast Guard member, who wished to remain anonymous, claimed that a prosthetic leg, typewriter, rosary beads, telescope, and what appeared to be some type of canine fur were pulled out of the warm Atlantic waters near the island of Bimini.

“I’m just devastated,” said Alvin, Coyote’s twin, on hearing of their disappearance. “Though, I do wonder why I wasn’t invited to the celebrations.” The former Chair of the metablog could not be reached for comment.