Fieldwork Opportunities with our friends at CSIS

Any bloggers out there looking for work that involves doing what you already do, that is observing, researching, analyzing and then reporting? I've found a perfect job for you as a surveillant:

The Canadian Security Intelligence Service (CSIS) is seeking applications for a career in surveillance in the regional offices of the Service. Candidates must possess a high level of initiative, motivation and discretion, with the ability to work a flexible schedule. Under the direction of a team leader, the Surveillant is responsible for :

• Conducting discreet physical surveillance.
• Researching and analysing information pertaining to surveillance.
• Drafting regular operational reports, detailing exact movements and activities.

Other Requirements
Candidates should be in good physical health and be able to adapt quickly to a variety of settings and situations and manage a high level of stress.

Besides being able to adapt quickly and manage stress, you'll need a driver's licence and a university degree (but it can be any degree at all! even a useless one like journalism.)

Also there are the "Security Requirements":

Candidates must have no criminal record, must not have used illegal drugs in the last twelve (12) months and must be able to obtain a Top Secret security clearance. This process involves a security interview, polygraph and a background investigation that includes credit and financial verifications.

Worried about the polygraph? The internet can help you there.

If your finances are in disarray, perhaps you should consult Gail.

And if spending your days eating pizza in a white van isn't for you, CSIS has a whole list of other immediate career opportunities.

The canal skating experience

Whillikers.

If ya didn't know the secrets of finding a good time in this town, ya might think that in Ottawa, on a kinda lamely labelled provincial civic holiday in the middle of winter, there'd be nothing else to do but skate on the kinda worse-for-wear Rideau Canal. And that ya might be one of maybe a million-odd Ottawattamies to think the same thing.

Actually, upon reflection, ya might be perilously close to right about that...

Look up. Wa-a-a-a-a-a-ay up.

Something we coyotes notice about many Ottawa residents is that they don't seem to look up much. We do, because we're just like that. It's survival instinct. Ya never know when one of them crows is gonna swoop in and try to swipe your bag lunch.

Anyway, this being the nation's capital, when we're swivelling our heads around, we often see stuff that you rarely see in other places, apparently unnoticed by everyone around us.

Things like a whole team of guys in black helmets and jumpsuits, from who knows what tactical team and who knows what paramilitary/military outfit, casually rappelling down the side of the Westin Hotel on a sunny November afternoon. Taking lotsa pictures of themselves doing it, presumably for their Top Sekrit Taktical Skrapbooks...






...so I took some for my Top Sekrit Taktical Skrapbook too. We coyotes are just like that.

Fish Tale

A few weeks ago, when I expressed my pleasure at Bob's series, nasty loos, he suggested that I photograph the fancy ones.

...mabye you can start a tradition of photog'ing fancy loos...

I have followed his suggestion.

Advertising in a toilet - fancy and clever! And, if you don't like the product being promoted, you can feel doubly satisfied at using the loo.

RNDP 12a: More Romantic Gestures that Score with Audrey

It looks like Audrey's beau is raising the bar ever higher for the rest of us fellows. She wrote this weekend to say:

My boyfriend and I met up with some of my friends for dinner at a trendy restaurant in Toronto on Saturday night. When I introduced my beau to one friend, I said, “and this is my boyfriend {Redacted} – I’m madly in love with him!” My friend was startled and said, “How wonderful that you can say that out loud and he doesn’t mind!” I looked over at my beau and he nodded and smiled.

My boyfriend really is the most romantic man I’ve ever met.

Audrey’s top-ten list of romantic gestures – continued

11. Show up at her home in time to kiss her and then walk her to work.
12. Clean out a drawer in your bedroom for her clothes.

13. Stock the bathroom at your home with her favourite toiletries.
14. Take her to see live theatre. (My sweetie took me to see Cirque du Soleil.)
15. Eat a huge piece of her cheesecake.
16. Celebrate her birthday for a week!
17. Go to her family reunion with her and pose happily for photos with her.
18. Go on a romantic vacation with her.
19. Send her romantic e-mails.
20. Tell her she was made for you.

Previously: RNDP 12: Romantic Gestures that Score with Audrey

In Harmony with Equal Opportunity

Harmony was doing her own version of being "in harmony" with Blue Skies last week-end. While others played music and sang, she giggled and/or snorted behind her Cosmo magazine.

During one instance she sweetly informed the men gathered under the gazebo that it was now absolutely OK for men to get a Brazilian wax. Fellas, any comments?

RNDP 12: Romantic Gestures that Score with Audrey

the picnic by Norma Desmond

Audrey, ESI's cultural ambassador, reports on recent fieldwork experiences and the results of listening to sage counsel:

Romantic gestures – Part 1

My boyfriends have typically been very reluctant to make romantic gestures. I always felt that it was not for me to tell a boyfriend to be more demonstrative. I reasoned that some men are just naturally more demonstrative than others. I decided that maybe the kind of men who were attracted to me were bold and sexy but not romantic.

A recent trip to Italy, though, caused me to question my theories. I had several dates with a bold and sexy Italian man. I was surprised to find that he was also a romantic. This man played romantic Latin music in the car; he took me for a cocktail at the stylish Café de Paris; he suggested a sunset stroll at the Piazzale Michelangelo and kissed me passionately at a particularly scenic spot; he shared his gelato with me; and he used flowery Italian phrases to tell me how much he desired me.

When I arrived back in Ottawa, I told my friends about my dates. Fourth Dwarf counselled me to choose an “attentive” man for a boyfriend, but to choose a man closer to home.

Well, I took his advice and my new boyfriend is the most romantic man I have ever met. He tells me frequently how much he loves being with me, and he makes many romantic gestures. I thought I would share some of these romantic gestures, in the hope that it will improve someone else’s search for true love.

Audrey’s top-ten list of romantic gestures

1. Buy her flowers – even carnations (my boyfriend gave me gerberas on our 4th date)
2. Buy her chocolate (esp. milk-chocolate) [4D: We're going to get letters about this one.]
3. Take her to the movies and only let her pay for the popcorn.
4. Have her over for a BBQ – just the two of you.
5. Meet her for lunch on a workday.
6. Take her for a romantic dinner (we went to Trattoria Caffe Italia on our 5th date).
7. Drive her home from work, even if you won’t be spending the evening together.
8. Visit her family with her and act like you are not anxious to leave after one hour.
9. Make her tea.
10. Tell her she is beautiful.