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Sunday
She's a soul (sole?) woman
Overheard at Hartman's IGA:
Young woman to clerk: "Can I get 100 grams of soul, please?"
I did not stick around long enough to find out if she was trying to divine the spirit of James Brown, or merely had a hankering for a certain kind of fish.
Now, in the movie 21 Grams, one's soul was said to weigh the amount reflected in the title.
That would leave our shopper just short of five full souls.
Thursday
This just in...
John Baird's cat dies. I had nothing to do with it, honest. But unlike most cats of my acquaintance, it was pretty much the exact opposite of delicious. I suspect environmental factors...
UPDATE: And Billy Bragg is my hero...
UPDATE: And Billy Bragg is my hero...
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Unknown
Tuesday
Cue the evil lighting...
An elliptical voicemail led me late last night to the doorstep of Mister Sloppy's evil world domination HQ in Centretown. After I buzzed the intercom and the reinforced door silently swung open, I let myself into the computer room. There, Mister Sloppy looked ineffably smug.
"Oh, hi, Slop! You called?" I said.
"Indeed. I brought you a gift from my trip."
He pushed a small corrugated carton toward me. One heady sniff and I opened it. Two dozen extremely fresh bars of Cailler Ultrafine Dark. None of that Tobler crap... Mister Sloppy's taste in gifts is legendary.
"Thank you!" I said gratefully. "And how was the vacation?"
"It was... very fine," he said. "Ate great ice cream. Sailed a private yacht on Lake Geneva. Took an excellent Swiss train to visit the Large Hadron Collider..."
"And how did that go?" I asked, an alarm ringing faintly in the back of my mind.
"It's working again, isn't it?" purred Mister Sloppy, fixing me meaningfully with a bright blue eye. "And good thing, too. I'm gonna be needing it."
"Eep! So you're still on the world domination thing?
"Does the mayor think he's finally a real civic leader because he hung out with Prince Chuck and John Baird's hair for a photo-op? I'm all over it!"
"Ummm. Oh. Look at that! It's bedtime for little coyotes. Thanks for the chockies. Gotta go! " I yelled over my shoulder.
"Oh, I know." Mister Sloppy's voice followed me out the door. "But you'll be back... I have more chocolate."
Fiend.
"Oh, hi, Slop! You called?" I said.
"Indeed. I brought you a gift from my trip."
He pushed a small corrugated carton toward me. One heady sniff and I opened it. Two dozen extremely fresh bars of Cailler Ultrafine Dark. None of that Tobler crap... Mister Sloppy's taste in gifts is legendary.
"Thank you!" I said gratefully. "And how was the vacation?"
"It was... very fine," he said. "Ate great ice cream. Sailed a private yacht on Lake Geneva. Took an excellent Swiss train to visit the Large Hadron Collider..."
"And how did that go?" I asked, an alarm ringing faintly in the back of my mind.
"It's working again, isn't it?" purred Mister Sloppy, fixing me meaningfully with a bright blue eye. "And good thing, too. I'm gonna be needing it."
"Eep! So you're still on the world domination thing?
"Does the mayor think he's finally a real civic leader because he hung out with Prince Chuck and John Baird's hair for a photo-op? I'm all over it!"
"Ummm. Oh. Look at that! It's bedtime for little coyotes. Thanks for the chockies. Gotta go! " I yelled over my shoulder.
"Oh, I know." Mister Sloppy's voice followed me out the door. "But you'll be back... I have more chocolate."
Fiend.
Posted by
Unknown
Labels:
Conspiriacies,
royals,
SRW,
Supporting the Mayor,
vacation tips
Friday
why am i riffing on fourth dwarf's gig
Wednesday
Finally, a sprinkling of public art
Ottawa's new watering can sculpture at the corner of Kent and Slater streets. Perhaps the can should be filled with vinegar given the nearby chipwagon.
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Labels:
art,
Ideas for Ottawa