The PC * Primer

* Pee Clues **

Well. After one's recent snappy exchange with the ESIs' (really, probably all of Ottawa's) favorite Sassy Redhead, one feels compelled to explore the topic in more depth. You know. Put one's nose to the ground, sniff around, tread a contemplative circle for a bit, satisfy oneself that one has found exactly the right spot, and then... one digresses. It must be instinct.

She raises a valid question. Why need we be concerned if a certain partner pees on himself, and only himself, then walks into a Tim Horton's? What business is it of ours? Other than because he blogged it for the entire Internet to read, I mean.

Well. I can only speak for myself, because other members of this little consortium may (okay, almost certainly do) have other thoughts on the topic.

In my view, though, if he's going to make a habit out of this kind of thing, there are products out there that are way better adapted to some form of human riding in an auto's shotgun seat, than Coke cans.

More importantly, as one of several four-legged species that regard this form of communication with the utmost seriousness, I have to say that if he's peeing on himself, that's just a totally egregious waste of perfectly good territory-marking ammo...

** C'mon! You didn't think this was going to be about Political Correctness? Personal Computers? President's Choice? Or, Dog help us, the Progressive Conservatives? Did you?!

Man, I feel like (telling) a woman

An intimate reflection from Audrey

I have noticed that, recently, I have had some very deep conversations with men.

They have frequently taken place at the Usual Spot. They have also taken place at small dinner parties (including my own), hockey parties in private homes and bars (Go Sens Go!), and even at weddings (esp. while eating yummy Greek food).

As well, I have had these conversations during vacations in Europe with friends, in e-mail messages, and on the phone.

It seems that, these days, my male friends and I are always cautioning each other, don't blog this, before launching into a detailed story. We seem to be opening up more to each other. It seems that we suddenly all know about each others' salaries and mortgages and love lives and, unfortunately, angst.

In the past, only my boyfriends would have intimate discussions with me. They would tell me of the girlfriend who left them for their best friend, of the father who beat them, of the impact on them when their parents divorced or when one of their parents passed away suddenly, of their financial and career worries.

My other male friends would discuss romances, family, work, and money, but only on a very general level. (My women friends and I have always had these intimate conversations - especially when we have been trying to figure out men!)

However, now my eyes have been opened to the fact that men worry about the same things that my women friends and I worry about!

Men worry about:
1. Why a love interest only wants to be friends with them;
2. How they should treat a love interest if that love interest is already in a relationship, but if there is undeniable chemistry between them;
3. What are the appropriate levels of intimacy with a love interest;
4. How long they should stay in their present job.
5. How to dress well, without appearing to have made any effort;
6. How to take care of friends and family members who are going through a tough time;
7. If they should rent or buy. And, if they wish to buy, should they buy a family-sized house if they are single;
8. If they should have children, get married, settle down;
9. What is the best way to live a meaningful life; and
10. How to get over a broken heart.

Have I changed, or have men?

Words that won't get you laid

Audrey sent me a link today for a piece by Ariel Leve on the Times online. I suspect that Audrey agrees with Ms Leve.

Words Not To Live By

Sometimes someone will say something and immediately, I’ll lose interest in continuing the rest of the conversation.

A few years ago I went out with a man who ended a message on my answering machine with “rock on”
As in, “I’ll try you again tomorrow….rock on.”
What’s wrong with good-bye? Or nothing at all. Just hang up. We weren’t meant to be.
I’ve discussed this with a few of my friends and I’m not alone. Certain sayings can be an instant turn off.

Here is a partial, not comprehensive, list of things people should stop saying:

1. Pardon my French (after cursing)

2. Anyhoo

3. We’re not in Kansas anymore

4. Rock on

5. What’s the plan Stan?

6. Give me a shout

7. Fancy Shmancy

8. I’m just calling to say howdy

9. Hell-o?

10. Who’d of thunk it?

Now I understand why I so seldom had calls returned after I said "Give me a shout" on voicemails. I wish I had seen this list a long time ago. At least before I bought the t-shirt with "Rock on" spelled out on the front and "Anyhoo" on the back.

Are there other phrases I should be avoiding?

More People Trying to Limit my Dating Life

Bad enough that the Chair set out strict limits on who I get to go out with, there's a bunch of Midwesterners producing propaganda reels.

Click To Play

Five life lessons learned in the last week

1) Trying to get insurance companies to cooperate with you is challenging when you are homeless.
2) Getting your cat a root canal or yanking out your cat's tooth costs exactly the same.
3) Getting your cat's tooth yanked out costs more than getting one of your own teeth yanked out.
4) Paying others to clean after you have vacated your place is money well spent.
5) Carrying your old heavy CPU down narrow basement steps with no railing when you are a little bit drunk is a very bad idea.