Tuesday

Foreign interests

Last week, the federal natural resources minister, Joe Oliver, came out all rabid attack-doggy on "radical foreign elements" set on infiltrating and hijacking the Northern Gateway pipeline hearings to bring up environmental issues. Some kafuffle, huh?

Northern Gateway would be, if you've had your head buried in the, ummm, sands, these last weeks, a really big pipe for pumping great wads of sludge from the Athabasca tar sands, through some of BC's most pristine remaining wilderness to the west coast, where megatankers (...none, we hope, named Exxon Valdez...) would bug out for China with it.

It's the government's, ummm, better alternative to the now-shelved Keystone XL project, another big-jeezuz pipeline that was designed to pump that self-same sludge through some of Nebraska's most pristine wilderness, and thence to the refineries of Texas et.al. Are you starting to see a theme? And what could possibly go wrong?

Yesterday, in another vaguely-fawning Peter Mansbridge interview, the PM appeared to cool the hot oil cauldrons. Although we should remember that: A) This is a guy who's all about appearance over reality; and: B) He'd have to have approved Oliver's frothy yappin' in the first place. There's a definite strategic messaging advantage in that kind of thing: He looks about as reasonable as he's capable of of - which ain't very - as he sweetly opines that "Canada shouldn't be one giant national park for the northern half of North America."

This is pretty much standard operating procedure. The Prime Minister's Office tells the useful idiots on the back benches and in the ministers' thrones to say the really dumb/incendiary crap, so he can later look prime ministerial while he pours heavy oil on troubled waters.

The troubled waters in this case, though, are in the Athabasca River. As an Alberta doggy, I can vouch for its beauty if you ever get that far north. Not to mention the Beaufort Sea, where it empties. You know. The Arctic Ocean. Where, notwithstanding all those, well-enforced environmental regulations, increasing masses of escaping toxic aromatics seem likely to eventually ooze from the giant settling ponds surrounding a growing bunch of heavy oil mines - pretty much owned by, ummm, foreign elements.

One is China. Judging by the monumentally appalling way that country's government treats its own environment in the name of economic gain, I don't imagine they'd give a rat's ass about screwing up Canada - good - to feed their own strategic oil wants. Ditto the U.S. of A.

If Joe Oliver thinks I'm some kind of dangerous radical for considering that environmental concerns deserve a serious airing in any discussion of the tar sands, let him. He's kind of heavily biased. And kind of wrong. In his own way as much as a fossil as the animals from which all that evil-smelling goo in Athabasca came from. Hey! Maybe he's so defensive about the tar sands because he's related!

Way I see it, Canada being one giant national park may indeed be dreaming in technicolour. But it shouldn't be one giant black national toxic waste dump, either.

Friday

Mister Sloppy wishes you all a Joyous HannuKwanzaChristmas...

Mister Sloppy has asked me to convey to you a heartfelt "Merry Christmas!" Given his extensive rap sheet, ummm, history (1), (2), (3), (4), (5), we can only suggest that this sort of unbidden friendliness on his part suggests - strongly - that if you are anyone who carries a wallet, you should check your pants. Just to, ummm, confirm that said wallet is still in 'em.

Now that I consider that advice further, you should probably check your pants anyway. Just to confirm that you are still in 'em...

Mister Sloppy is that good.

Merry Christmas, everybody. And a happy New Year. May your holiday season be pantsful and free of evil-genius larceny. Unless, of course, you're into that.

Monday

Not just Il, but dead...

I know we're not supposed to speak, ummm, Il of the dead. Heh.

But i felt kind of inspired. So, here you go. I wasted untold minutes on this. It was very therapeutic.

Now, if you need me, I'll be in the fallout shelter...

Tuesday

Ottawahenge or Ottawagate?


Here's something odd...

On November 30, Trevor Pritchard over at Ottawa.openfile announced a photo contest for photos of the sun setting on Sparks Street to be taken between then and December 5. The prize for the winner would be $75 and a featured spot on their blog.

Early on December 5, Pritchard announced the contest deadline would be extended to December 9 because of cloudy weather.

Later on December 5, our own Coyote posted a photo of the sun setting on Sparks Street taken that day titled "A line runs through it". Coyote's photo shows no clouds in the sky and also shows no other photographers stationed on Sparks Street poised to capture the magic moment.

On December 12, Pritchard announced the deadline would be further extended to midnight on Jan. 13, 2012 because the weather has blanketed the downtown with overcast skies for most of the past two weeks but the sun will be back to setting in the perfect position on January 10.

Pritchard says Openfile has "a desperate need to give away $75", but I wonder how desperate they really are.

We all know Coyote won't actually take the money because it would mean revealing personal information like where he does his banking. But he'd love the attention.

Friday

Paging Councillor Bubbles


From the Agenda for next week’s meeting of the City of Ottawa’s Transportation Committee:

COUNCILLORS’ ITEMS

Councillor Tierney

5. ABANDONED SHOPPING CARTS ON CITY PROPERTY - MOTION

      CITY WIDE

      WHEREAS shopping carts from malls create a hazard and an eyesore when taken off store property and left on City property; and

      WHEREAS, there have been numerous reports to 3-1-1 and Councillors offices in this regard resulting in the City spending countless hours and resources returning shopping carts to their respective stores; and

      WHEREAS the Municipality of Mississauga currently has an existing Shopping Cart By-Law which the City of Ottawa could reference as a template;

      THEREFORE BE IT RESOLVED that the Transportation Committee direct staff to prepare a report for Q1 2012 to examine the costs and benefits of the City establishing a program to retrieve store carts from City property, including the option to bring them to the closest City yard for storage until such time as the respective store owner claims and picks up the carts, and establish a fee for the release of the carts to help offset the costs of the program.


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