Showing posts with label whoring. Show all posts
Showing posts with label whoring. Show all posts

Friday

Together at Last


FOR IMMEDIATE RELEASE


(OTTAWA - Aug. 21) Ottawan’s have waited for this moment. And now it’s here. Two musical greats bring down the house in this once-in-a-lifetime concert event.


On Saturday night at Britannia Park, on one stage, at one time.

Bruce and Britney: Together at last.


Hear some great collaborative songs:



Hit Me Baby One More Time (and I will go to the Woman’s shelter)

If You Had a Rocket Launcher In Your Pants

Toxic (Chemicals that is)

I’m a Slave 4 U and Your Fascist Architecture

Rumours of Glory Booty



It’ll be social justice-alicious.



-30-

Tuesday

Dirty. Secrets. Buzz. Shower not included.

We ESIs have a recurring conversation along the lines of: Are we simply shameless? Or are we desperately shameless?

With that in mind, a new book caught my roving eye: Dirty Little Secrets of Buzz by David Seaman.

Now here's an author who walks, er, rather, runs, the talk. Scribe Seaman promises in a press release to jog around New York's Times Square naked if his book doesn't crack the Amazon.com Top 100 within three days. That takes cajones, or at least the willingness to flap them in the Big Apple breeze for all to see.

"With the recession as it is, sometimes an author has to put everything on the line to get attention for a worthwhile and exciting read," Seaman says. "Book sales are down at an apocalyptic rate for most authors due to the downturn, and I'm willing to take a risk here . . . This book is worth my reputation, and possibly a couple nights in prison."

The tome is billed as "the definitive guide to guerrilla fame and cutthroat viral marketing."

And the ESIs should leap on Seaman's advice like Jack Layton pouncing on a can of mustache wax.

A few choice chapter subtitles:

* Celebrity Tabloids: Getting in them or staying out of them
* Enemies are more important than friends
* Be Outrageous or Die!
* Google juice: hot links from highly rated sites
* TV doesn't make you - you make you
* Get ten thousand visitors for free through StumbleUpon

* Overcoming publicity post-partum depression: Knowing when and where to find the next hook

Having said all this, I'm not sure Ottawa is ready for the ESIs parading their individual wares down Elgin Street if we fail to win a CanBlog Award. (With the possible exception of Coyote, who never wears pants.)
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