Like clockwork

Some things are as predictable as the seasons. I can tell it's autumn again, because City Councillor "Dog" Thompson, after mostly, ummm, lying doggo all summer, is once again fulminating about the apocalyptic looming infestation of untrammeled coyote hordes in Ottawa's far burbs. Yoohoo! Dog! Us coyotes all live downtown! The restaurants here are less likely to be crummy nationwide chains, and after tony bistros stack their chairs for the night, the cats of Parliament Hill make fine midnight snacks, ummm, excellent conversationalists...

Yet I have to say that I am beginning to become concerned about ol' Dog's persistence. It's like I'm playin' a roadrunner to his, ummm, badly-drawn Wile E, or something. Also worrisome is the fact that he now seems to be trying to bring a provincial cabinet minister onside. You know the jig is up when somebody initiates an investigative committee in the provincial ledge. They could deliver a non-partisan, all-parties proposal to scrutinize me with a legislative task force, in a matter of mere decades.

I am also worried by the increasing proximity of certain winsome wayward wallabies this week. It seems that Wendell, since his big jailbreak, has hopped it all the way from Kemptville to the fringes of Ottawa. How are ya gonna keep him down on the farm, after he's tasted the City That Fun Forgot's wild nightlife? And there have been ominous suggestions from Wendell's erstwhile screws and the Australian wallaby cognoscenti that if cute little Wendell bites it, it'll probably be a coyote that bit him.

People, I swear! It's a setup! I'm bein' framed! Now, excuse me. I have other fish to fry. And where did I misplace that bottle of Tangy Memories of Billabong Sauce...?

Tank Top Tuesday on Wednesday

Playing with Manny Blue's Boas

Propping up Palin or Meeting Innocence

They all batted their eyes at me at some point during the Hallowe’en party, and they all acted brainless bubbly like the real Alaskan Queen.

The Erratic Genius claims that, “The props is what makes a costume.”

Well, the first Sarah that I met had focused on the real Sarah’s curves, and placed two pairs of shoulder pads in her bra to give herself a more rounded look. She also wore a much envied homemade vote button. (see picture above)

The second Sarah carried a shot-gun all evening and pointing it at people while sing songing, “Drill baby, drill!”

The third Sarah proudly clutched a portfolio filled with home and garden type magazines and was escorted by her own Joe the Plumber.

But here is the point of this post - two people at the party had never heard of Sarah Palin!

“Innocents!”, I blurted out envious of their purity.

House of Representatives

Who knew the U.S. election would be fought not only in Ohio and Florida, but on Bay Street in our own Centretown? Perhaps, just weeks ago, colourful Dion and Harper posters hung in rowhouse windows somewhere in Washington, driving a most Canadian wedge between unparliamentary neighbours.

RNDP 18: More Developments

Let's take a poll: Who wants the Revolutionary New Dating Paradigm (RNDP) to be over? Everybody. Me too. There are many other things I would like to blog about. For example did you know that there are people out there who think "selfless" means something bad? Click on this google search link if you do not believe me.

But I cannot wrap up the RNDP quite yet because new developments and research keep coming out.

Detecting Infidelity: A study by Paul Andrews and colleagues at Virginia Commonwealth University in Richmond reported in New Scientist, concluded that men are better at detecting their partner's infidelities than women. In a study of 203 young heterosexual couples, while 29 per cent of men said they had cheated, compared with 18.5 per cent of women, 80 per cent of women's inferences about fidelity or infidelity were correct, while men were accurate 94 per cent of the time.

But then the authors mention these other points:

• "... men were also more likely to suspect infidelity when there was none... "
• "Complex statistical analysis of the data hinted that a further 10 per cent of the women in the study had cheated on top of the 18.5 per cent who admitted to it in the questionnaires, whereas the men had been honest about their philandering." [10%+18.5%=28.5%]

The authors do not remark on how astonishing it is that all these men who had lied to their partners chose to be honest with a group of psychology researchers.

What do we learn from this? We learn that there is still grant money to be gained in looking for differences between men and women.

HookupMaps
HookupMaps is a new website that combines the personal ads in Craiglist with Google Maps. So far it is only available in San Francisco Bay Area, New York, LA, DC, San Diego, Virginia, and Maryland.
If they do not add Ottawa soon, perhaps we could prevail upon the people who created the Ottawa Crime Map to do this for us.

The Locasex Movement
Perhaps when you read about HookupMaps, you were thinking, I don't need no stinking Google Maps Mashup! I can get sex the old-fashioned way by flying across the country to spend a dirty weekend with my sure thing.
However, over at Lifehacker, Mark Ontkush reports that there are those within the ecology movement who are pointing out there is a huge environmental cost to long-distance booty calls.

The Guys like those Red Dresses
From the Globe and Mail:

A series of studies by researchers at the University of Rochester has revealed that men are far more attracted to women in red clothing or surrounded by red accessories than females who sport other colours. What's more, men seem to be especially generous to the lady in red - and are more willing to open up their wallets to wine and dine her.

Warm Drink, Warm Heart
From the LA Times:

Looking to improve your romantic odds? Get your date a steaming cup of coffee.
That's the implication of a new study by researchers who wanted to see if there was any connection between physical and emotional heat.
To their surprise, people who held a cup of hot coffee for 10 to 25 seconds warmed to a perfect stranger. Holding a cup of iced coffee had the opposite effect

Maybe Nice Guys Don't Finish Last?
From Medical News Today:

Displays of altruism or selflessness towards others can be sexually attractive in a mate. This is one of the findings of a study carried out by biologists and a psychologist at The University of Nottingham.

Advice Gleaned From All This:

1. Give money to street people while on a date.
2. If you're at a bar and attracted to your date order Irish Coffees. Unless you've already decided you're not interested. In that case, ask for vodka that's been kept in the freezer and order extra ice cubes.
3. Once again, the Liberal party girls have the advantage over the NDP, Conservative and Green party girls.
4. You'll be easier on the environment if you date local.
5. If you're a young American, you've got about a 1 in 3 chance of finding a partner who won't cheat on you. If you get such a partner, you'll most likely figure it out, but to be sure, you should hire a social scientist to include your partner in a study and then carry out complex statistical analysis.